Sacrament by: Clive Barker

This book was one of those rare situations in which it came so highly recommended (and in such detail) that I knew the entire plot of the book before I started reading it. And for those reasons, I really did not care for it all that much.
As with all Clive Barker books, or to be fair those that I have read, the story begins going in one direction with a plot line you understand and can actually follow. Two chapters later you are following a plot line taking place when whats-his-name is a child!!! THEN THE TWO PLOT LINES INTERMINGLE!! and yeah, at that point I was still following, you know managing in probably more accurate, then you are thrown into some strange combination of the above where you are in his real life with flashbacks to all the other timelines you have witnessed thus far.
The basic premise of the story is a great plot line and it really has some great characters and some incredible twists and turns in the (very distorted and at times so hard to follow) plot. I really enjoy the fact that Clive Barker always creates really three dimensional villains. In this case two of them who you really can very VERY easily just despise with every bone in your body. put together the two, brother and sister/ though more accurately soul mates, live for the destruction of species and (at least it seems) the calm and normality of life.
One methodically wipes out the last two of a species keeping careful diagrams and recordings, while the other drowns herself in the affection and sexual interest of men, usually ending in a pool of blood and body parts. The two of them get involved in a little boy's life and from then on both are tormented with the very idea of their experience together and the affects that ensued in their separate yet entwined lives, drawing many similarities between the gay night life of San Francisco "back in its hay day" before the aids epidemic and the cruelty of the laws of nature.
God, I was sick of hearing about this book before I read it, sick of it while I read it, and now I am so sick of talking about it!
Though kudos Clive Barker, no matter how aggravating I find it, I continue to discuss it with a variety of people.

Flowers For Algernon by: Daniel Keyes

What a tragic story.
This novel actually began as a short story and was later elongated to become this book. In mid elementary school, we read either an excerpt or that short story and it had been on my to read list ever since. What finally got me to read the book was one of my roommates (who was Russian) happened to see it on my bookshelf and got super excited and borrowed it and read it in English for the first time. (apparently it is a part of their curriculum over in Russia as well, which is actually pretty amazing if you think about it).
This is one of those books that took me a day to read. Yes, it is pretty short only 216 pages, but it was more along the lines of how unbelievably empathetic you are towards Charlie and how much shit he goes through. At first he is the most lovable and sweet man. He goes through the testing for these experiments to make him smarter than, or at the very least as smart as the average adult. You read his diary and walk with him through the changes first in simple things such as vocabulary and spelling, next to being aware of social cues and notices that his friends are actually not so friendly at all.
He grows in knowledge at an incredible rate and with that does not necessarily come wisdom and understanding.
Charlie progresses through his learning and he becomes more and more isolated, as he quickly reaches an intelligence far outshining the doctors who did the surgical procedure on him. he withdraws into himself as it becomes more and more apparent that his treatment is not a permanent situation and has a time limit. He experiments with love and sex and experiences loss and grief.
When the treatment runs it course and he begins to degrade, he lashes out and is in such turmoil that the reader feels as if they are in the same situation. By the end of the novel he has to be institutionalized and you experience with him, every intelligence level on the spectrum.
Genuine in its raw emotion and moving in its personification of the affects intelligence has on the individual and how they relate to the world and those around them. Definitely a book I will be reading again as it was so engaging (and I really do need a dictionary at some points just to understand the enormity of Charlie's intellect).

REST IN PEACE ALGERNON.

The Ruins by: Scott Smith

Can I just say how refreshing it is to find an author who is so successful in being terrifying and disturbing that you have nightmares, and I mean wake up lurching out of your skin nightmares.
I have read Jaws, which is one of my deep terrors I might add, several Stephen King novels, Clive Barker and several miscellaneous horror novels over the years, and none of them have ever left me wide eyed clutching my blanket in the dark.
I picked up this book at a thrift store more out of a whim than anything. I had seen the movie a few dozen times when it came out in 2008 and loved it. Not that it was scary but because it was the ultimate sleepover movie and it was awesome. So when I ran across it at a used book store I was amazed that it was a book and I was intrigued but didn't buy it, it was something like eight dollars for a torn book, no thanks. So when I ran across it THE NEXT DAY at a different store for one dollar in perfect condition I bought it and started reading.
At first I was honestly a little shocked. There was no waiting for the story to begin. No boring back story you have to get through before you can get the meat of it. The second day of reading this, the group was stuck on the ruin and poor poor "Pablo" was having his legs eaten away by the accursed vine. Didn't even realize this bothered me until I was calling my oh-so-supportive-and-understanding  boyfriend, at something like 230 am, going on and on about how the flesh was hanging off my arms.
For the next three nights the same thing. Every night I was tossing and turning with these damn vines haunting my subconscious.
Glorious.
Till the end when the author is describing the exact sound you would hear as you cut off your own ear. I was literally sitting there squealing with disgust. And that my friends, is a beautiful thing.
This is one of those gems you find that is the very definition of horror. It has everything you want in a book from gut wrenching gore, to drama between the characters, and a villain (in this case a plant) that can creep into your brain and latch on for months to come.
A must read. I am most intrigued as to whether this is one of those authors who do a one hit wonder, or if he is the second kind who does nothing but outstanding books.
Opinions?

The Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlaine Harris

Also known as: The Sookie Stackhouse Novels, or the (Damn) Trueblood series.

Yes. It is official: I have finally finished the series! (can I just get a hell yeah real quick?!) Not that they are hard reads, they are actually incredibly easy and quick as F*** to read, there are just 13 of the damn books and that takes a minute to get through.
My original plan for this post was to have a quick blurb about each book and my qualms or reactions to the plot or drama or LACK there of, but as I am sitting down to do so, I find I don't care enough to do so. (oh the laziness of me!) But seriously, I began reading this series a little less than a year ago, and am only just now finishing so the beginning books are just not in my head anymore and the suspense has long since perished. (ha ha vampire jokes).
I am fairly positive you have either listened to some random person in your life go on and on about either these books or the STUPID TV show, Trueblood, read them yourselves, or you are guilty of being a fan of the show. (in which case YOU HAVE TO read them if only so you can get pissed off and rant and rave about how wrong the show gets everything, and that's just always fun), so you must know the general premise of the story. Sookie Stackhouse is a telepathic waitress working at Merlotte's bar in Bon Tempe Louisiana. She is semi antisocial, annoying as hell, and considered in the book to be all sorts of beautiful and cute and whatever. The series starts with her meeting Bill. Her first vampire she has met since their "coming out" 3 years prior, at least I thin it was 3. (Now, I saw a few episodes of the TV show through out the years, and Bill was poorly portrayed. He is supposed to be essentially tall, reserved, sweet, and old fashioned.) Anyways that's a whole other conversation, he gets in trouble with some drainers, and she helps him out and thus they fall in love blah blah blah. From then on its one huge roller coaster of supernatural adventures and escapades, most exciting, some ridiculous to even be reading, mostly entertaining.
First its the vampire politics in her little part of Louisiana, then it widens to the state, then the werewolves and shape shifters get involved, and they are actually very cool and interesting, then its the faeries. Literally. And THAT goes on for like 3 books too many I must say. Sure you find out she is part fairy so they are her relatives and all, but there are only so many ways you can talk about how inhuman they are before it becomes repetitive.
Throughout this all little ol' Sookie is bouncing through guys like a pinball machine (that's not quite fair, she only really bounces between 4 guys and between 13 books that's not bad at all, though its the same ones over and over and over and over...) and you want to just punch her and scream at her to make a decision, but she is fictional so you can't. Bollucks.
Each and every one of these books are full of plot twists and character deaths and all the stuff books need to be good, there's just WAY too much of it!
Side note: I hate when authors have so many ideas and instead of just writing a longer book, they cram it all into 300 pages and calls it a day. What's wrong with a long book??? Why is that something to be avoided or afraid of? Its like damn movie directors cutting out scenes so the movie is shorter ( though its not even 2 hours long!!!) I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND IT!!
So many events take place, so quickly, that your head literally starts spinning. Don't get me wrong! I did read them all, which means I did enjoy them, but if each book had about 50 more pages then you would have had some time to blink at least between explosions at vampire summits, vampire queens being dethroned, and torture by faeries instead of one head twist after another.

All in all it was entertaining and it passed the time. Will I read them again? probably not. Do I regret reading them? Not at all. But now I get to watch Trueblood and mock the horribleness of it even more than usual and that my friends: Priceless.

Its not all the books there but it was the best picture I could find. Frustrating.

The Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella

Fun Fact! Sophie Kinsella (who you probably know of as she is the author of those Confession of a Shopaholic books, which are great!) is a pen name!! Her real name is Madeleine Sophie Wickham and she is described as a "chick lit" author and never a more appropriate title for her work.
As always her book focuses on a single female character in England. In this case London. (though I think all of them have been in London now that I think it over).
Meet Samantha Sweeting. Professional on top of the world Lawyer, workaholic extraordinaire!
Doesn't mind working 12-14 hours a day as long as she is in the running for the partnership at her law firm. Word on the street is that she is in for the job when she discovers an overlooked memo on her desk subsequentially losing a client 50 million quid.
Va-moose to the partnership and va-moose she goes. Right out of town. She winds up in the English countryside at a house where she is mistaken as someone interviewing for a housekeeping position and she gets the job! Despite the face she cant clean or cook of course.
Thus begins a very hilarious and most entertaining adventure of an almost hopeless city raised women (who thinks boiling eggs means microwaving them!) as she learns how to iron, bake bread, and learns what it is like to slow down and appreciate life for what it is.
Though as entertaining and light hearted as ever, it does raise the question of whether the city life of the modern society is actually all that it is hyped up to be or if the country life (or old fashioned type of living I suppose) is a more sustainable and healthy way to live. (and of course her super chunky sweet gardener lover she meets through all of this vs her not so hunky chunky STUPIDLY named coworker "Guy" just saying, not a cute name.) Yes yes yes Nathaniel. ;)
Not getting in to THAT argument!
Strongly recommended for a light girly read when you just want to pass the time chuckling now and then (though not so girly as a Nicholas Sparks).

The Stand by Stephen King

Let me just start by saying that:
1. I read the uncut edition so it is 300 pages longer than usual (bringing the length of this book to a whopping 1142 pages) and..
2. This was my third attempt at reading this book and you know what they say... Third times the charm!

I actually bought this book at the goodwill over on Geary St, (that's the Tenderloin in San Francisco) quite deliriously in a feverish state. The store was closing as I walked in, ran to the books in the back, grabbed it and ran up front, and the dude behind the counter felt so bad for me (as I was delirious with said fever) that he let me just have it. (saved me $1!) That night as I was on my first attempt at reading it, my fever increased dramatically, developed a severe cold out of nowhere and had to turn in for the night early. '
For those of you who are unfamiliar with this book, considered to be one of Mr. King's most well-known (and from what I have read in reviews) and one of his more controversial and most discussed works.
Opening the story with a frantic soldier, abandoning his post and running off base in the middle of the night with his wife and baby, and winding up most gruesomely deceased in the next chapter, you get to know what the characters most frequently refer to as: Captain Trips. (which is some reference I don't quite understand I must admit)
Captain Trips is a man made plague of an ever shifting "superflu." A nasty cold that transforms itself as your body produces the antibodies needed to fight it off, so quickly that it is 99.4% contagious and 100% fatal. 300 pages into the book 99% of the population is dead leaving those who are immune to deal with the shock and sudden absence of a civilization. Slowly straggling together you get to know a deaf-mute (yet highly charismatic) young man named Nick Andros, an almost rock star Larry Underwood, a young and knocked up young woman Frannie Goldsmith, Stu Redman also known as east texas, Harold Lauder, Glen Bateman (my favorite character, a college sociology professor), Tom Cullens (a most lovable and admirable retarded man who is so sweet and caring and childlike. M-O-O-N that spells Tom cullens) and many many others who are the survivors and those who for whatever reason are immune to this disease.
Fucking. Amazing. Not one of these characters are dull or 2 dimensional. Each and everyone of them have gone through several transformations throughout the story and when any (or all of them, for all YOU know) die you grieve yourself because you have witnessed their transformations and their "growing up." This seems to be a talent that most authors have not achieved, or maybe im just being biased, but Mr. King is a master of. Character development is definitely one his high points.
Anywho, I'm rambling at this point, they progress and begin having these dreams of a dark man (the representation of the devil) and Mother Abigail a 108 year old woman living in Nebraska on her small farm (the representation of God). At this point all the characters you have met meet up either in Vegas (how fitting is that for the evil side of things) or in Boulder, Colorado in terms of the "good".
I don't want to give too much of the plot away but I could talk about this books for an hour. One of the most difficult books to get through ONLY BECAUSE all three attempts at reading it I suddenly get sick with a cold of one form or another, Coincidence?!
Since 99% of mankind is now dead, The stragglers of the world go through cities described as graveyards, silent, dead, god forsaken even. The world is empty and quiet as opposed to the usual hustle and bustle of life. These days the hustle and bustle is bike riding or if you are lucky driving. (only lucky I say because of the traffic jams on most streets and highways). The world is deserted. Government vanished. Civilization waiting to be rewritten and reestablished. Do they copy the not so distant American government? do they model themselves after a new idea? a pre-established idea? what about law enforcement? jails? The dead left to rot everywhere??? Life is one huge question mark left behind after all modern conveniences are cut away. Sure electricity is set up and ready to run.. but its not. Does anyone know how to make it work? anyone left that is? Water plants. sewer systems. Plumbing. Everythign needs to be relearned and rethought. The implications it asks are down right fascinating!
For instance this one discussion between Glen and Stu really tickled my fancy. Glen (the sociology professor) was going on about how mankind has mostly perished to extinction but didn't. Same with the dogs. As far as he could tell all horses are gone, but the cats are untouched. The rats have been affected but repopulate so quickly its a moot point. The deer are untouched and now unchecked. Sure the implications affecting human population are clear enough, but what about the rest of life? The ecosystem is completely thrown off and unbalanced. Or is it rebalanced negating the effect man has on the earth?? He himself has a dog Kojak who survived but they don't know of any others. if there are more dogs will they even be able to reproduce? Can humans even reproduce? Will the babies be immune?
What I am trying to say is get off your ass and go read it. It took me 21 days to read (which is a hell of a long time in my world) but now that it is over, I am deeply saddened and if I hadn't left the damn book at work I might just be rereading it now. Towards the end it got a little too blatant in its good vs evil concept (but there is always one aspect of Stephen Kings books that just irk me to no end)  but it was necessary to the plot and I cant even think of an alternative. Someone needs to read this book so I can discuss it relentlessly.
So get reading!! (maybe its time to tackle Under the Dome next). For the second attempt.

2014 books

Books read in 2014

1.       The perfect storm by Sebastian Junger

2.       At First Sight by Nicholas Sparks

3.       Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card

4.       Julie and Julia by Julie Powell

5.       Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice

6.       The Hours by Michael Cunningham

7.       Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton

8.       Wicked by Gregory Maguire

9.       Marley and Me by John Grogan

10.   Jaws by Peter Benchley

11.   She’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb

12.   The Hungry Ocean by Linda Greenlaw

13.   Pompeii by Robert Harris

14.   The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger

15.   Confessions of a Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella

16.   The Horse Whisperer by Nicholas Evans

17.   Love Me Back by Merritt Tierce

18.   Weaveworld by Clive Barker

19.   Shopaholic Takes Manhattan by Sophie Kinsella

20.   Shopaholic Ties the Knot by Sophie Kinsella

21.   Confessor by Terry Goodkind

22.   Revolutionary Road by Richard Yates

23.   Rose Madder by Stephen King

24.   The Old Man and the Sea by Hernest Hemmingway

25.   Dead Until Dark by Charlaine Harris

26.   Deception Point by Dan Brown

27.   The Lost World by Michael Crichton

28.   Influx by Daniel Suarez

29.   The Vampire Lestat by Anne Rice

30.   The Illustrated Man by Ray Bradbury

31.   Living Dead In Dallas by Charlaine Harris

32.   Club Dead by Charlaine Harris

33.   The Dead Zone by Stephen King

34.   Shopaholic and Sister by Sophie Kinsella

35.   The Boleyn Inheritance by Philippa Gregory

36.   Dead to the World by Charlaine Harris

37.   Shopahilic and Baby by Sophie Kinsella

38.   Can You Keep a Secret? By Sophie Kinsella

39.   Eat Me by Linda Jaivin

40.   The Stars Shine Down by Sidney Sheldon

41.   The Princess Bride by William Goldman

42.   Accidents of Marriage by Randy Susan Meyers

43.   Severed Souls by Terry Goodkind

44.   Wizard’s First Rule by Terry Goodkind

45.   Stone of Tears by Terry Goodkind

46.   The Constant Princess by Philippa Gregory

47.   Anthem by Ayn Rand

48.   The Thief of Always by Clive Barker

49.   Tell Me Your Dreams by Sidney Sheldon

50.   Shutter Island by Dennis Lehane

51.   Dead as a Doornail by Charlaine Harris

52.   Inferno by Dan Brown

53.   Definitely Dead by Charlaine Harris

54.   All Together Dead by Charlaine Harris

55.   From Dead to Worse by Charlaine Harris

56.   Dead and Gone by Charlaine Harris

57.   Dead in the Family by Charlaine Harris

58.   The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman